Everything You Need To Write Your Dissertation, You Can Learn From Sex: 4 Hot Tips

  1. Be specific. Academia will not tolerate fuzzy generalizations. Find the words to express exactly what you mean, and you’ll get the response you want.
  2. It gets messy. Don’t expect your dissertation writing process to fit neatly into your program director’s instructions. Find joy in chaos and spilt liquids.
  3. Get to the heart. Do whatever it takes to clarify your thesis, your study question, or your hypothesis. Then let it guide your every move.
  4. Try a new position. When things go awry, go at it from a different angle. It’s amazing how much better everything feels with another perspective.
Sexy Grammar invites the writer in you to a turned on, engaged, and unapologetic creative life. We believe that sex and writing go hand in hand and that the creative process can be thrilling, pleasurable, and satisfying. Ready for your free Private Session?
2012
08/08
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The Story of Sexy Grammar: Lesbian Sex Tricks & Your Target Market

“Do you want to make her come?” I asked the circle of men around me. “Or do you want to make her come with your dick?”

Long before I taught entrepreneurs how to build social media campaigns, I taught a class I called Dyke Tricks For Straight Dicks at the Bay Area’s clean, well-lighted store for sex toys, Good Vibrations.

Teaching men about female pleasure anatomy showed me how to ask good questions, reach my audience, and consistently deliver a wildly popular message–that some women want more than penetrative sex from their male partners.

Inevitably, the men who attended my Dyke Tricks classes learned something about female sexual pleasure. The women in their lives thanked me with referrals, requests for advanced classes, and sometimes even flowers. And I learned how to motivate a target market.

 The Sexy Grammarian  is a small business owner who brings passion and marketing savvy to Private Sessions that help fellow entrepreneurs find the words to tell their story and sell their services. Get a free Private Session with the Sexy Grammarian now.
2012
08/06
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Poet-Ghosts In The Attic: Vesuvio

This is a 5-star review

Vesuvio

255 Columbus Ave
(between Broadway St & Jack Kerouac Alley)
San Francisco, CA 94133

Up here on my second floor perch at Vesuvio, the table is too small and sticky for spreading out papers. The raucous conversation of the party of nine at the table beside me has crescendoed to hollering. And there’s no wifi. In fact, my phone won’t work at all.

But I am still writing. It feels like every word I write might have a breath of genius in it, like a beat poet’s ghost might take me by the hand and help me along. I scribble madly. I drink cheap wine. I smirk at a bus load of tourists snapping pictures in the muraled alley below.

Vesuvio isn’t just a good place to write. It is the place to write in San Francisco. Shake off that fear of artistic cliche, grab a pen and a tattered notebook, and show up for happy hour at 3pm on weekdays. I’ll see you there.

Take yourself out to a cafe to write. It’s good for your writing and good for the economy too. This review has been cross- posted on Yelp, where you can read all The Sexy Grammarian’s cafe reviews as well as reviews clients have written about our services.
2012
08/03
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Everything You Need To Write Your Social Media Content, You Can Learn From Sex: 4 Hot Tips

  1. It’s not the size of the boat. It’s the motion of the ocean. Nobody cares how long your blog posts are or even how often you post them. What counts is that your content schedule has a rhythm that’s right for you and your readers.
  2. It’s better to play with others than with yourself. Social Media is social. Engage, interact, comment, and respond.
  3. Lubrication helps. It’s easy to get uptight about what you’re posting and how you look out there, but remember to have fun too. Flirt, laugh, and play on the Internet to draw more followers and fans.
  4. Imagination trumps knowledge. Let your creativity drive when you’re engaging in social media. The art form is so new, there’s just not that much to know yet!
Sexy Grammar invites the writer in you to a turned on, engaged, and unapologetic creative life. We believe that sex and writing go hand in hand and that the creative process can be thrilling, pleasurable, and satisfying. Ready for your free Private Session?
2012
08/01
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The Story of Sexy Grammar: Peep Shows & the Power of Fiction

I straddled the brown plastic wastepaper basket and made a kissy face at the man behind the glass. I tried but couldn’t piss. This is unusual, I thought.

Before I became a writer and tackled my first novel, I worked at a peep show, San Francisco’s World Famous Lusty Lady, a literal window into a gutter-glam world not everybody sees.
That particular day found me torn between my conservative work ethic–the guy had forked over $200 for a golden shower show–and my fear of spraying a fine mist of urine all over a tiny glass box I shared with a hundred other women. Still the new girl, I’d listened attentively to bitter dressing room complaints about bodily fluids left behind for other dancers to clean up.
Not everybody has been in that unique conundrum, but anyone can find herself stuck between a rock and a hard place with her pants down. Novelist Barbara Kingsolver says of fiction, “It cultivates empathy for a theoretical stranger by putting you inside his head, allowing you to experience life from his point of view. It can broaden your view of gender, ethnicity, place and time, power and vulnerability, all the elements that influence social interaction.” That’s what compels me to write fiction: the opportunity to tell a unique story that cultivates empathy in the world around me.

The Sexy Grammarian is a writer struggling to tell her story, just like you. When you get a free Private Session with The Sexy G, you get a teacher, a collaborator, and an empathetic writing partner to help unfold your burning stories
2012
07/30
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Wicked Grounds: Where the Sex Geeks Write

This is a 5-star review

Wicked Grounds
289 8th St at Clementina
SoMa, San Francisco

If you’ve never spent time in the kink community, you might not expect it to be as geeky as it is. You might imagine the whips and chains party spaces to feel more like a beefcake gym than a campus study room. But anybody who’s spent any real time at a sex club or dungeon in this town knows that plenty of the players in our kink community are total brain-iacs: writers, scientists, educators, and health care researchers.

Don’t believe me? You don’t have to creep around in the shadows of a sex club to see this celebrated subculture in action. Go sit in a café, mind your own business, and soak up the friendly, sassy, study hall vibe at Wicked Grounds.

There’s no better place for such a gentle introduction to the world of kink than this  café/gallery/playspace/community center. The vibe is warm–and hot–just a teensy bit cruisey. The wifi works great, and there are plenty of people writing on laptops, so yes, you can also come to Wicked Grounds for my favorite café pastime: writing. Folks are studying here. My table is stable. And my cookie is fresh baked. The music is familiar and pleasant. The customer service is top notch.

Wicked Grounds welcomes anyone with an open mind to come on in and participate at whatever level makes you comfortable. Flirt with the adorable and knowledgeable baristas. Purchase a naughty birthday card. Take in an erotic painting. Get down on the floor and sip your coffee from a doggie bowl, you dirty little pig! You can dabble, or you can go all the way. Nobody’s going to judge you. Nobody cares.

Take yourself out to a cafe to write. It’s good for your writing and good for small businesses in your neighborhood too. This review has been cross posted on Yelp, where you can read all The Sexy Grammarian’s cafe reviews as well as reviews clients have written about our services.
2012
07/27
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Everything You Need To Write Your Novel, You Can Learn From Sex: 4 Hot Tips

  1. The uninhibited shall be rewarded. Letting loose with your most imaginative storylines will set your fiction free. Don’t be a prudish writer.
  2. Your interests are normal and healthy. Even your most outlandish ideas have an audience. Let your freak flag fly in your writing.
  3. You need release. It’s downright painful to keep the creative force inside you pent up. Avoid literary blue balls with a daily writing regimen.
  4. Everyone loves a climax. A climactic conclusion doesn’t have to be the point of your story, but you’ll get better reviews if your readers feel like they’ve had a satisfying ride.
Sexy Grammar invites the writer in you to a turned on, engaged, and unapologetic creative life. We believe that sex and writing go hand in hand and that the creative process can be thrilling, pleasurable, and satisfying. Ready for your free Private Session?
2012
07/25
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The Story of Sexy Grammar: My Ovaries & Your Dissertation

“Do you feel that?” I ask the young woman leaning into my body with her eyes shut.
“Uh huh,” she says, concentrating.
“That’s my ovary.
She opens her eyes, elated. “Wow! I felt it! I get it!”

Before I became The Sexy Grammarian, I taught medical students  how to provide comfortable and effective genital exams for Project Prepare, where I still pick up shifts because I love the work so much.

Later, I read my student’s course evaluation: The best thing about this session, she writes, was putting the book knowledge together with the real thing–like feeling an actual ovary. That’s learning!

Providing this kind of radical sex education offers me the thrill and sacred duty of applying theory to the 3-dimensional world. Dissertations and other big academic writing projects require enthusiasm for the same scientific magic. You’ve got to write about what you’ve learned and how it applies to real life. That’s why I love helping people finish their degrees and find joy, pride, and satisfaction in their work.

The Sexy Grammarian loves learning just like you. Private Sessions with The Sexy G ease the rigorous climb to academic writing achievement with compassionate guidance and gentle support. Get a free Private Session now.

 

2012
07/23
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The Family Business: Wild Hair Ranch

This is a 5-star review.

The Wild Hair Ranch

San Luis Obispo, California

We had not set out for a writing retreat weekend. We did not go to The Wild Hair Ranch to bathe. But in this magical and well-appointed country farm house where our extended family gathered to share a roof for a wedding weekend, I found inspiration and a bathtub I’m still pining for.

The owners have pulled off a rental-by-owner miracle, inviting renters into their everyday home rather than a weekend or in-law space, and they do it with a sense of generosity and pride in their dream home. Outdoor features included a trampoline that entertained kids and adults alike, an abundant and welcoming vegetable garden, a lively chicken coop, a hidden tree house, and a wood-stocked fire-pit. We played hard, and when we retreated indoors, we enjoyed a kitchen large and sturdy enough for a family full of cooks, a playroom with a fire pole, musical instruments, and dreamy beds for all twelve of our clan.

Industrial Chic, my dad called the design aesthetic. He’s got a way with words. The modern architecture straddles the folksy comfort of a farmhouse barn and the urban pragmatism of modern architecture. The Wife and I scored the guest room, which adjoins the master bath, and there we found Wild Hair Ranch’s most luxurious amenity, a soaking tub with room for two and a sublime view of the surrounding fields and hills.

There’s something about getting away, out in the country, or being in a professionally decorated environment, or on a farm, or under an architecturally innovative roof–I’m not sure which–that inspires me. So in spite of our harried wedding weekend schedule, in spite of a house full of family, in spite of my preoccupation with my tiny niece and nephews, I found myself up early each morning, parked in some sunny, comfortable nook or other, writing.

So is it a place for a writing retreat? Maybe. Maybe you could plan a raucous one with a dozen of your best writing collaborators, or perhaps a business retreat for you and a handful of your company’s leaders.

Writers and small business owners, we suggest you whisk yourself away on a writing or strategy retreat. This review has been cross posted on VRBO, and on Yelp you can read all The Sexy Grammarian’s cafe reviews as well as reviews clients have written about our services.

2012
07/18
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Past Perfect Tense: Dear Sexy G,

Dear Sexy Grammarian,
I have a grammar question!! Would you say: I thought we finally realized or I thought we had finally realized? Does it matter?

Thank you for your continued dedication to grammar and sexiness,
Christine

Hi Christine! Thanks for writing. You’re talking about the difference between past perfect and past tense here. Depending on your meaning, either of your examples might be okay. You’re telling a story in this sentence that definitely happened in the past: I thought.

Now, whether to make the other verb in your sentence past tense (finally realized) or past perfect (had finally realized) depends on when you thought that final realization took place.

Past perfect describes a past that took place before the past tense. So, did you think you had finally realized at some time before you thought about finally realizing? Probably. In that case, you should write, I thought we had finally realized. But on the off chance that you thought you were realizing something at the same time you were thinking it, you might write, I thought we finally realized.

Yours,

The Sexy Grammarian

Frequently, a client or online fan shares a burning grammar question, and I always post answers here on the blog.  If you have a question, don’t hesitate to write to me. Looking for more attention? Get affordable, project-focused private sessions in person or via Skype or email.

2012
07/11
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